NOISE

Ok I know I sound a bit ridiculous to bitch about noise in the country's largest city, but glass recyclable pick up at 3am? How the hell is the glass outside my building not picked up until 3am?

I also love the fact I'm paying more than I'm comfortable with in rent (as are we all, I know) and my building couldn't double-pane the windows? My building grosses about a million a month, A MONTH, and they couldn't install double-paned windows for a building a half a block from a fire station.

The honking cabs, I've lived here 3 years and been in a cab maybe 2x with a legitimate reason to honk. Not turning on green when pedestrians are crossing, not sure why that's their fault. Not anticipating the green light 1 second before it actually turns green, I'm pretty sure running a red is still illegal even in NYC. Blaring your horn because god forbid someone makes a mistake and brakes to turn, or actually stop, I get it, you're stuck behind them for 1-3 seconds until you can switch lanes but come on, I value the hustle and bustle but the added noises are getting to me.

I know I'm bitching because there's nothing I can do to change this except I guess move....but then how could I bitch about living in NYC if I don't live here... :)

Emergency Vehicles

Could you ever imagine having a legitimate emergency in this city and then having to depend on an ambulance to save your life? I think if I was ever hit by a car, I'd fare better hailing a cab to the hospital. For whatever reason, no one moves for ambulances. It's like people see and hear the siren and are like "Now if I just stay put, then I have a better chance of making this light then the dying person inside". I honestly hope they have a secret subway system for real emergencies and emergency vehicles just make an appearance when someone is hungry or needs to use the bathroom.



This morning on my walk to the subway, there was an ambulance to my left trying to navigate through the cars. Everyone stayed put, and at one point an SUV passed it on the right! Like screw that guy, I'm using this opening to make MY getaway. I think I passed the ambulance at one point WALKING. All joking aside, I really hope there's another method of transportation during rush hour that I'm unaware, or else legit doctors and surgeons are the ones in charge of the emergency vehicles and the hospital is the destination for a post op recovery.

Recycling

Ahhhh - recycling actually makes me feel giddy. I have been recycling my whole life and every time I throw a can or piece of paper in the designated bin, I actually feel good. Now that I live in NY, I have the complete opposite feeling because I'm forced to throw my recyclables in the garbage every single day.

Yes - NYC has the facilities set up for recycling and yes every apartment building at least has separate bins to do so. Unfortunately, businesses don't seem to care to join this little society that exists around them. I guarantee anyone who works in the city has gotten emails from corporate about becoming more "green" and not printing emails, and signs in the bathroom the shitty toilet paper is "green".(Exhibit A below). Its depressing that even if a random floor I worked on had a bin for cans, none used it, and the few that did, the maids combined the bin with the trash.



I was at my old company when they started doing budget cuts, and they removed all our cups and plastic silver wear in order to be more "green". It was irritating and a waste of time every time I brought my lunch and would go to grab a fork and instead had to decide if I would waste time going else where to find a fork, or try to use coffee stirrers as chop stix. The latter usually prevailed.

I decided to respond to the head hancho's "we're sooooo green" email one day and point out the fact that their NY office, which is their headquarters and employees around 5,500 employees didn't even recycle. Well, he responded about a month later and informed me how difficult it is to recycle in NY...that was it??? Seriously??

I've had to give up, no commercial space for whatever reason in the BIGGEST CITY IN THE USA recycles. So now every time I throw a can in the trash, I can actually hear an entire rain forest being destroyed. And it's all my fault.

Pigeons

If you or anyone you know tries to tell me you like Pigeons, I will come find you and punch you in the face. The number of those filthy birds inhabiting the island of Manhattan blows my mind, yet I'm pretty positive it's illegal to shoot them.

My hatred for these creatures intensified this year when I moved into my new apartment. The 2 foot crevice between my building and the one next door has created a haven on my windowsill for a family of pigeons to call home. They coo, fly, walk, and apparently have a party on the sill outside my shower on a 24/7 basis. Of course my window has a tiny opening between the 2 panes of glass so I even get little feather presents in my shower occasionally.

I was told ammonia will keep them away, and I've poured so much on the windowsill I personally can't be in the room and they still continue to come back. I'm out of ideas, I think I'm going to just go buy a shot gun and pray I don't get caught.

The 6 Train

I hate the NYC subway. I have never had to deal with such an unreliable, uncomfortable and unsanitary form of public transportation in my life. Every single morning I take the 6 train and every single morning I have a new reason I hate the 6 train. When I lived in London, I rode the tube to work. While the tube isn't perfect, nor does it run 24 Hours like NYC, it has simple features such as a "next train" monitor so you know how long you're waiting, and the trains feel relatively clean, people are courteous about getting on and off and you never really feel that uncomfortable.

Today the 6 train was delayed approx 3-5 min at every stop between 96th street and 42nd street.
In the last month:
-I've been almost knocked over because people couldn't wait until everyone had exited before they got on
-Forced to get on the express train because the 6 stopped running during rush hour, to proceed to sit in between stations for 10 minutes so the 6 could run on the express track
-Had to actually exit the train station and take a bus because the train had to run express for an hour
-Groped on a crowded train "by accident"
-Ridden next to a man's bike with talking cheerleader doll from the 70s on it that he would come in from riding outside the train to turn the doll on at each stop
-Had to change train cars because a man smelled of urine so badly, the entire car stunk
-Had to change train cars because someone had puked all over and the entire car stunk

Sadly, I could go on and on. Instead, I have 2 solutions:
1) I am getting the hell away from the upper east side and the devil run 6 train
2) I am finally buying a bike

Why "Thank You"

Maybe it's my midwestern parents, maybe its the upbeat, positive attitude where I grew up, or maybe it's because I was just simply raised properly, but I think its pretty standard to get a simple "Thank You" when I hold the door for you.

Since moving to NYC, I don't think I have sneezed without a "bless you" yet every single time I stop to hold the door open for someone, 9 times out of 10, it is not followed with a thank you. It makes me wish that door had slammed you in the face!

My favorite memory was coming out of the elevator bank at my old company followed by some slow moving, older men, presumably partners in the firm. I had my lunch and purse in my hand, yet I stopped and waited to hold the door for these men. Not a SINGLE one uttered any sort of word or noise resembling gratitude.

Mothers and fathers of this great city, please teach your kids proper manners of saying thank you. I don't need to stand outside Grand Central freezing and holding the door for a family of 7, I'm not a porter or valet. I'm just a nice, courteous, concerned citizen who worries about the basic manners escaping this city.

Dryer Vents

Walking along the streets of New York City is like walking no where else. We look up to gorgeous skyscrapers, see all different kinds of people and dogs everywhere we look and are greeted with temptation at every corner, in the form of expensive clothing stores, exotic-looking members of the opposite gender, and, of course, all the tasty eateries. But, our leisurely city walks are different for another, more sinister, more repulsive reason:

Dryer vents from restaurants.

Nothing interrupts a beautiful stroll with a friend or a significant other more than the putrid scent of garbage incinerator… or a hearty breath of Hamburger smoke… or a generous gulp of air filled with the odors of burnt rubber, spoiled greens and cleaning products.

In New York City, despite the fact that plenty of restaurants point their air vents inward, toward alleys and courtyards, there are still many, even along the finest avenues of the Upper East Side, that direct their unwanted exhaust up the nasal passages of poor passers-by outside.

I’ll never forget the day last summer when I was jogging along Park Avenue and, in an innocent gasp for air, I was forced to cower in disgust, overcome by dry heaves brought on by the burnt-bread and cheese odors being casually emitted by a fancy French bistro.